Smart people.

During dinner this evening, I overheard a conversation at a nearby table. There were four twentysomething people at the table, and their evening's discussion started out with each person's academic experience - each one had at least one master's degree, and one fellow had three.

Since Melba was pretty quiet tonight (I suspect she was also listening in), I followed along with quite a bit of this table's evening chitchat. I can't put my finger on anything specific that was said at the table, but the overall impression I got from eavesdropping was that none of these people were very smart.

Let me qualify that a bit. I'd bet that each of these people outscored me on the SAT and occupy a higher tax bracket than I. They sounded perfectly friendly and were well spoken, but I just couldn't shake the impression that none of them had done much learning in life outside the walls of a school.

The scene got me to thinking about the people I consider smart. A diverse life experience and a desire to learn every day are two things that define the smart people I know. They're the kind of people who can hold their own in an intense debate about politics with a professor, yet are also able to comfortably shoot the shit with the mailman about his family. There are a lot of qualities that go into being smart that are far beyond what tuition will buy.

Well rounded. Skilled in social situations. Well traveled. Street smart. Empathic. Well read. Down to earth.

I'm not really saying anything you don't already know. I can't think of anyone who would disagree with anything I've written here, but the more I think about what it takes to be smart, the more qualifications I add to the list. To be honest, I hadn't given this theory of mine much thought before tonight, but I find it an interesting topic and wanted to share.

I'd love to hear your feedback.

A haiku, or two - or maybe more than a few - I hope they don't suck.

Am I a poet
who just doesn't yet know it
on second thought, nah.

--

Winter's snow: missing
winter's cold: also absent
winter's clouds: kickin'.

--

Great weekend with friends
good food and fun, drank too much
I feel old sometimes.

--

Little fuzzy face
true unconditional love
Duff, good for my soul.

--

Two weeks 'til Belize
beaches, sun, good food and fun
dammit - I can't wait

--

So tired today
work is painfully boring
I napped at my desk

--

She asked for haikus
I knocked out an easy one
She rocks my iTunes

So... sleepy...

I've been wanting to post, but didn't have access over the weekend and have been thoroughly wiped out since we got home Sunday night. With any luck, I'll have some tidbits in the next day or so. In the meantime, feel free to check out my "365" site - I did manage to get that up-to-date.

I might just merge that site with this one - after some thought, it seems rather pointless to manage two blogs when there is plenty of room on this one for the daily photos.

Lutsen!

Melba and I leave this afternoon for a weekend of fun with a pile of good friends in Lutsen, MN. This has been a somewhat-annual trip for the group for the last handful of years, and should prove to be an excellent time.

One of the mainstays of this event is the Inebriated Buffoonery Award, bestowed upon the drunkest/craziest partier of the weekend. Melba is the current owner of the old snow ski emblazoned with the names of past winners, but we'll be bringing it with in the hopes of letting someone else store it in their closet for the next year.

Flip over to my 365 blog for pictures of the weekend as I post them. Assuming someone doesn't take my camera away from me.

TTW: Street Survival.

Last Saturday I volunteered to help out with a program called the Street Survival Teen Safety Driving School, which was run by the local BMW club. There were about 30 kids in the school, 15 instructors, and a handful of volunteers including me, there to chase down errant road cones from the course. Rather than try to describe the school poorly in my own words, I'll use some of their website text:

"The primary emphasis of the Street Survival school is a "hands-on" driving experience in real-world situations. We use your own car to teach you about its handling limits and how you can control them."

After seeing how awful these kids were on their first road session and how much they improved throughout the day, I'm completely convinced of the value of this kind of instruction. If you are the parent of or know a teenager, get them into one of these courses. Not only do they learn to be more confident behind the wheel, the class does an excellent job of teaching car control and accident avoidance.

The best $60 you'll ever spend.

Hunyuck(er)

After asking a few people here and there, I think I solved the hunyucker mystery. I found out that my dad just added an -er to the end of hunyuck. So he pretty much called me a rednecker. Just for that, I'm gonna ring his phone up a few times and leave some cryptic messages.

Too bad he doesn't know how to retrieve voicemail.

Thinking.

I've never posted a meme before, but I was "tagged" by zorak163 (Space Ghost!) to do The Thinking Meme, so I will not shirk my bloggerly responsibility.

1. If you had to choose one vice in exclusion of all others what would it be?
Does speed (velocity, not the drug) count as a vice? For me, the sensation of speed in all its forms is an immeasurable rush. Skydiving, driving fast, flying, etc. etc.

2. If you could change one specific thing about the world what would it be?
Banish religious intolerance. Without that, this little planet would be a lot more peaceful.

3. Name the cartoon character you identify with the most.
Brian Griffin. I'm not as smart, but I like to think I'm just as sarcastic.

4. If you could live one day in your life over again which one would it be?
Racing at Watkins Glen. Reminds me of the saying "racing makes a heroin addiction look like a vague craving for something salty".

5. If you could go back in history and spend a day with one person who would it be?
This one's tough. I'd like to say Adolf Hitler circa 1930 so I could take that bastard out, but that's probably a little harsh. I'd dig being able to shadow Albert Einstein for a day.

6. What is the one thing you lost, sold or threw away that you wish you could have back?
I've lost a few friendships that I think about almost daily.

7. What is your one most important contribution to this world?
I haven't made one yet, and I sometimes feel selfish because of it. I probably think about this topic more than I should.

8. What is your one hidden talent that nearly no one knows about?
I can sing like a motherfucker. But only in the shower.

9. What is your most cherished possession?
Duff. I do deeply dig the Duff.10. What one person influenced your life the most when growing up?
My dad. It scares me to admit that.

11. What one word describes you better than any other?
Effervescent.

Dream it, ya dreamer.*

It isn't often that I remember my dreams, but on the rare occasions I do they sometimes prove to be amusing. Last night's dream started out with me sitting in our living room with two handguns, facing the TV. There was an image of a dartboard target on the TV, and I was taking shots at it with the smaller of the two guns I had. Good fun! The shots didn't hurt the TV, so I switched to the bigger gun. To my surprise, the bigger gun was deafeningly loud, so I only shot the TV with it three times.

At the end of my shooting session, I got up and examined the TV - it was fine, but there were bullet dents in the wall behind the TV. For some reason, I was not concerned.

* This is a picture of Elvis' TV at Graceland that I stole from a fellow blogger. If it's yours and you don't want me using it, let me know and I'll take it down.

2007.

Just a quick update on my 2007 resolutions.

1. Lose 2 pounds per month: Started at 200.5 on the 1st, weighed in at 197.5 this morning. Good progress.

2. Get on a budget: No progress here yet.

3. Take a standup or improv comedy class: Found out that the next "Improv I" course that I will be able to fit into my schedule and afford will start on Feb. 20.

4. Get the show online by March 1st: Still need lights. My kingdom for some decent lights.

Dumpster divin'

I've been wanting a little dorm-sized fridge for my studio for awhile now. I've scanned Craigslist here and there, but never found one that thrilled me. Today, I walked to the studio and on my way in I saw a small fridge by the building's dumpster. Normally, I wouldn't give it a second look but I noticed that the fridge's power cord was chewed up.

So I dragged it upstairs, wired up a new power cord, and sure enough it fired right up. Cool! A quick trip to Supermercado Panamericano for bleach-fortified cleaner and 30 minutes of scrubbing later (it wasn't very dirty, but I wasn't taking any chances), I have a nice little fridge for the studio.

Things that work: Google Analytics

Back in early December, I discovered the happiness, the glee, the sheer delight that is Google Analytics. Google Analytics (GA) is a free service that lets you "see how visitors actually interact with your site" (their quote).

I'd been wanting to find a tool to do real site analysis for awhile, and was ready to pay for one when I found GA. GA gives more information in a better, easier to use interface than any of the pay sites I found. My favorite screen is the map for seeing where your visitors are coming from:And I also dig the page that shows which keywords people are using to find your site on search engines:Of course, there are many other features in the site; number of hits and page accesses, new vs. returning visitor analysis, and a whole lot more. Oh, and many thanks go out to Stefanie for all the referrals I'm now getting for "castration stories".

Good peoples.

Melba and I went on a blind double-date for lunch today, and had a damn good time. I've known Newt and her Hubster for awhile through reading Newt's blog, but we recently emailed back and forth about favorite local restaurants and I got the idea of the four of us meeting for lunch. I wasn't sure she'd go for the idea, since I could very easily have shown up in a white panel van wielding an ax. You just never know.

We met up at the 5-8 Club, which is known for a burger called the Juicy Lucy. Of course, all four of us ordered one up. Mine was solid, a definite homecooked vibe to the burger, and the onion rings were excellent. Even better, I always like an onion ring that doesn't divulge it's entire onion on the first bite. The only downside to the meal was the french fries - they were just... ehh. Go for the 'rings.

The moral of this story: meeting people from Teh Internets is cool. No white vans.

Minirants

Three things, in list form. Just the way I like it:

1. Twice today, people around me were having arguments with either themselves or some imaginary person nearby. One guy on the bus this morning was raving at high volume about some indecipherable annoyance, and on my walk over to the studio this evening another guy was mumbling obscenities to himself. Is this what happens to you after you've lived here too long? Or do I just attract lunacy?

2. I've noticed that taking one photo per day is tough when it's still dark as I arrive at work in the morning, and the sun sets about 30 minutes after I get home. This winter thing might be a little bit challenging.

3. Dad finally dialed me up tonight. Turns out the only reason he wanted to talk to me last night was to tell me that the mega-bucket of laundry soap at Costco is nowhere near as large or as cheap as the mega-bucket of laundry soap at Sam's Club. Dad loves to rave about all the cheap stuff at Sam's Club, and I just don't have the conversational stamina to tell him why Sam's/WalMart is evil. So I just nod.

Voicemail from dad.

When I'm at work, on the bus, and about town, people stop me all the time to ask me one question: "Dude, why are you so weird?"

I've got a good answer for that. This is my source, my floating air biscuit of weird, if you will:Yes, he wears his hat like that all the time. One night Melba asked him why; he said: "Because my little Jap doctor told me to keep my head warm." Oi vey.

My dad has recently discovered this newfangled hula hoop called voicemail. He loves to leave me weird little cryptic messages, and for some reason he thinks he needs to shout to be recorded. Here's a good example of a message I got yesterday (volume warning):

Then, 30 seconds later, another fragment of the puzzle:
From the messages, you'd think he was answering a question I'd left on his voicemail. You'd be wrong. My message to him was "Hey, I have a surprise for you. Give me a call." I had to call him back to figure out what the hell he was talking about.

Tonight, I got two messages:

And then exactly THREE minutes later:

WTF!? He gives me three minutes to return his call. And I don't even want to know what a "hunyucker" is.

2007.

As promised, I've created a new blog. I couldn't come up with a catchy title for it, so I just ran with "365". I plan to shoot at least one picture per day in 2007, and that's where I'll post them. I invite one and all to take a peek and leave comments.

Since I'm nothing if not a lemming, I've made some resolutions/goals for 2007:

1. Lose 2 pounds per month. I'm six foot two, 35 years old, and this morning I weighed in at 200.5 pounds. By this time next year I want to weigh between 175 and 180, hopefully achieved through a combination of exercise and better eating.

2. Get on a budget. As I mentioned, I'm 35 years old - but I manage money like a 12 year old. I have very little savings, and I often find myself coming up short. No excuse for that.

3. Take a standup or improv comedy class. This one will be tough to forget - there's a cool looking little comedy school one floor down from the studio that will taunt me mercilessly if I don't follow through.

4. Get the show online by March 1st. I need lights for the show, and they have proved to be quite elusive. Used lighting kits seem to be made out of unobtaininum, new ones are dang expensive. But I'll figure something out by 3/1.

That's it. Looking at my list, 3 & 4 should be pretty easy. 1 will be harder, 2 will be very tough. It'll be interesting to see how I do.

Continuing the lemming theme, I'd like to make some predictions for 2007:

1. The Minnesota Twins will win the World Series.
2. I will move to California.
3. The Iraq war will continue, with no major changes from the way it is running now. - there will be no substantive troop draw-down this year.
4. Paris Hilton will fade.
5. MySpace will fade.
6. There will be a scandal involving the Bush administration serious enough to garner hearings, the interest of the Attorney General, and talk of impeachment.
7. Gas will consistently cost $3 per gallon by the end of the year.

That's it. Not going out on any huge limbs with any of those, because I always play it safe.

Anyway, here's to a kickass 2007. May it be less filling AND taste great.